Day 5

I didn't swim last night but did this morning. First morning without a headache. I was going to do some work for this friends shop. Couldn't find him so thats delayed and I'm glad to get out of it for today.

Had a bad night. Not due to my illness but something just as deadly. I had a nightmare about my ex (harms people like hep-c in human form) He was a con man that I married for 1.5 years. He opened up credit accounts in my name towards the end. Although I made a police report they didn't go after him. Although the case is still open. It's not easy in the US to prosecute a spouse. He was also on every internet dating site during our marriage. Having affairs. He had eight kids. I accepted them all. He went to Church. Was all a cover or he is so sick he can't tell right from wrong. He could be another jack the ripper for all I know. Would not surprise me. I feel emotionally raped. He is a lier and also a sex addict. People a sex addict is not someone that likes sex. Its a whole other dark side. It brings a coldness to a man or woman. Its too much to tell. Only his first wife and I know this darkness. So last night I had a nightmare about him. I went to turn on the house alarm while I slept. I accidentally pushed the panic button so the police had to come even though I called to stop them. And my eye still looks bloody from blood leakage because I took aspirin. So the officer checked my house. This nightmare has shaken me up. He still is out there doing harm. And women are his victims. He is using a military ID to get around on flights to the UK. He is dishonored discharged from the Navy. I didn't know that till I filled the police report. He also falsified documents to get into LSE and where we lived in London. I didn't know till I had the laptop checked over. I haven't told them because I needed tx and I wanted to be finished with this horrible mess maker. I will try to turn all over to authorities. He could have ruined me but I'm a tough one.
I went out to do an errand and thinking about the nightmare and him brought uncontrolled sobbing. I will just stay home till I'm not shook up. I'll be alright. He has sealed his fate. He has just made a problem for me to forgive and forget him. One problem is everytime I watch the news and see one of these guys that pop-off their wives I think of him. I'm so blessed that didn't happen. He tried to get life insurance on me. I found the papers. He would have trouble because of my hep-c. The main thing is I'm safe, he is gone, I found out about him and got out of the marriage fast. Its obvious I have some work to do or I won't have such horrible nightmares. His first wife and I compare our dreams. She is Native American and I'm part Native American. We both believe in our dreams telling us things. I called her but I remembered shes up seeing her mom on the reservation. No phone service there.

Day 4 of post tx

I got up to swim and by the time the daily headache was better my son was out by the pool. I just like to be alone. I did an errand and came home. I took a quarter of an anti-d. Then had stomach problems from the anti=d. That took a couple of hours to subside. I took a half of an anti d a few days ago. I will continue to take a quarter every few days and see how I do. I won't rush it. I'll go for a evening swim which will be very tranquil. I want to go to California next week but my eye is still bloody looking. Not attractive. I want to go to a Church Singles activity while in California. I like the people there. Here they are all in Clicks. Its like high school. Maybe its like that everywhere and I just haven't noticed. My tx buddy hepkittie went to Naples for her celebratory post tx trip. She has Italians around her and that is like adrenaline. So she should be getting energy just from her surroundings. Can't wait to hear about her trip.

Next day

Last night very achy. Maybe from swimming.
Woke up with bad headache again. Got up and saw myself in the mirror. My right eye was bloody. My mistake was taking the aspirin for the headaches too soon. That thins the blood. I'll get my bloods done next week. I had the blood orders sent in the mail. I canceled my appointment today for the GI doctor. No use paying 50 dollars for my weight and blood pressure. I will see my primary doctor next week for pain meds and b12 shot. This next year my goal will be to come off the pain meds or get on a lower dose.

I did swim this morning. Felt great. Still had headache so went back to bed. Had nice talk with the kids today. Nice to talk to them about who they're dating and their lives. Nice to have that closeness. During tx my mental state was so much worse. They didn't want to talk to me much during tx as you never know how I'd react or what I'd say. The one thing that helped me feel the closeness from the family was having family prayer each day. So simple and yet so many benefits. I remember when they were little and we'd have family prayer before they went off to school. It was nice. We all liked it. Sorry, getting off track but maybe not. That was part of tx and it helped me stay bonded to the family.

I went swimming again this afternoon. Only did a few laps. My muscles were aching last night. I have to remember my blood will take a little time to level off so I need to be careful. I will try drinking more water tonight. That may help the headaches.

Day 2 of 1 week post tx.

I'm going to keep writing in this blog. Hopefully the post tx part of this blog will give hope to others. Thats what I'm counting on. I woke this morning with a horrid headache. Yesterday I swam and then showered and went to the Temple. Was tired all night. As I woke, I was sick in bed till about noon. I had enough of the sickness. So I took an excedrin. They are good for headaches but have aspirin in them. Couldn't take it during tx. I just took one and it did the trick. So I went for another swim. Swimming is best for your joints since you are weightless. Also it uses all the muscles at once. Its the lazy mans workout. Thats me. :) Maybe I'll sweat some of the toxins out of me in that heat. Of course it gave me a headache again.
The guy that takes care of the pool came by. He has hep-c and his brother also has it. After seeing his brother go through a year of tx and not have success, he does not want to tx. I talked to him today to show him I'm doing great (maybe not in the head). I told him about Nomads support but he isn't interested for awhile. Seems timing is everything for tx. Next time I'll tell him I'll talk to his brother if he'd like.

Good beautiful moment

You know the beautiful moments you have. Maybe a sunset or watching children play. I have one of the sweetest just now and only because of all I've been through for 6 months. I found my swim suit from a couple of years ago. I had thought I got rid of it. Its my favorite suit so happy it was still here. I put it on and it fit. Another happy moment. I put on lots of sunscreen and went into the pool for a swim. It felt so good, I can't tell you how good it felt. And went I got out it felt even better. I had that good buzz in my head from real exercise.

Pool surfing

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UCajzn5PV8s&feature=email


The guy in the suit is Travis. My son is video taping. I love the contrast of the swimming pool as the background, but instead of wearing a swim clothes he wears a business suit. He is pool surfing and then doing flips and dives. Good music in the background. Its a feel good video. And his Dad (a builder) has a nice pool.

Attitude (wanted to share this)

There once was a woman who woke up one morning, looked in the mirror and
noticed she had only three hairs on her head. 'Well,' she said, 'I think I'll braid my hair today.'
So she did and she had a wonderful day. The next day she woke up, looked in
the mirror and saw that she had only two hairs on her head.'H-M-M,' she said,
'I think I'll part my hair down the middle today.' So she did and she had a grand day.
The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and noticed that she had only one hair on her head. 'Well,' she said, 'Today I'm going to wear my hair in a pony tail.' So she did, and she had a fun, fun day.
The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and noticed that there wasn't a single hair on her head.
'YAY!' she exclaimed. 'I don't have to fix my hair today!'

Attitude is everything.

Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.
Live simply,
Love generously,
Care deeply,
Speak kindly.......
Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...

It's about learning to dance in the rain!!!!

Have a Great Day!